Thursday, May 23, 2013

Good-bye Visits, Which Daddy? and other Phrases I've Never Used Before

Composed earlier: 

Tonight my new daughter sleeps on organic cotton, Pottery Barn sheets in a beautiful pink and pink bedroom fit for a princess.  Tomorrow she says good-bye to her first family.  I won't go in to that story because it is not mine to tell.  However, the severity of that pain and grief and the significance of that loss are not wasted on me.  And, as we are comforted to be one step closer to making her our own, I am reminded that bad choices have destroyed a family and what could have been.  We are committed to seeing it made whole, through our Hope that is unwavering.  


    Isaiah 61:3
    To all who mourn in Israel, he will give a crown of beauty for ashes, a joyous blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of despair. In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks that the Lord has planted for his own glory. 


That is all.

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Six Months Later

So what!? lots of really successful bloggers take a 6 month hiatus from their blogs! Dear Loyal Readers, I apologize that for 6 months I left you all hanging.  Y'all, if you're still with me, well, what can I say? You are faithful, beautiful, friends.  I, mean, what kind of blogger goes silent for 6 months? My excuses:  the well was dry, my brain was numb, and I just flat ran out of time and things to say.  Truth is, I didn't want to update on the faithfulness of God or how trustworthy His plans are or how He is growing patience in me.  I suppose I could have blogged on the other thoughts in my head.  The ones that told me to take matters in to my own hands.  The ones that told me to make phone calls or let my husband get in touch with people who could help our cause.  I thought about being as drastic as calling my relative, who is the State Of Texas Agriculture Commissioner to see if he knew anyone in Family Protective Services and could "make a phone call."  Harley played a round of golf and was given the name of a guy who works with Catholic Charities, who was "always looking for placement of kids"(interestingly, Harley had just began a job for this guy as a client)!  It would have been so much more like us! After all, we are movers and shakers.  From the beginning of our lives together, waiting has not been our strong suit! We did marry after only a 3 month courtship!  We have been miles down the road while others were still trying to decide.  Most of the time, this has been something we feel fully peaceful about and fully blessed by God in, even when it didn't turn out the way we thought it would!  However, this time, the particular waiting and the particular patience required was much different!  Most importantly, we know the clear, loud voice of God, was saying wait, and we knew our stance was DO NOTHING and WAIT!  And we are so glad we did!

In late February, we were a finalist family for a sibling group of sisters.  We weren't quite sure this was the best fit, but we were willing to find out.  Then, the state picked a different family.  And just like that, very content to move on, we found out that we were finalist for another child.  This time, we had to GO to the meeting.  We sat in front of a panel of child protective service professionals.  We had to be ourselves and showcased why we were the best fit for this child.  Next to standing naked before them, we were as transparent as can be!  We were sensitive, solid, and funny.  We were serious, nervous, and teary-eyed. The next morning, we got THE CALL! We had been selected as the matched family!  I couldn't help but think of Psalms 37:4-6
Take delight in the Lord,
    and he will give you your heart’s desires.
Commit everything you do to the Lord.
    Trust him, and he will help you.
He will make your innocence radiate like the dawn,
    and the justice of your cause will shine like the noonday sun.
(Squeal)! Adoption happy dance!!

Still, even this, has taken us in unexpected direction and plans.  A little unsettling for this planner girl! We are now in a foster-to-adopt(legal risk) situation.  We fully believe that God is in control and have put aside our desires and wishes. (doesn't mean we don't still have them!) But most of all, we wish for God's desires and God's plan for us, for our family, for this child!  It's hard stuff.  It's good stuff.  It's actually the best stuff.

In the last month, we have gone from waiting to meeting a child to visitation of a child to official placement with the intended purpose of forever.  We are exhausted and ecstatic!

In closing, we are still in a critical season, and confidentiality is of utmost importance.  We are a foster family and now living in those uncharted waters full of documents, paperwork and visits of different kinds.  We ask for your love, support, and prayer always, but especially during this time.  We have had many of you bring gifts, send dinner, and prayer with/over us.   These are everything.  Thank you!

Psalm 68:6

God places the lonely in families...